


Dear Aster,

by Thatoneloser_kid



Category: The Half of It (2020)
Genre: F/F, a few years later
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-03
Updated: 2020-05-03
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:20:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23976628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thatoneloser_kid/pseuds/Thatoneloser_kid
Summary: Ellie and Aster continue to send each other letters after heading to college
Relationships: Ellie Chu & Paul Munsky, Ellie Chu/Aster Flores
Comments: 22
Kudos: 553





	Dear Aster,

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn't not write these two, especially with how it ended.
> 
> Let me know what you think?
> 
> Thatoneloser-kid.tumblr.com

Ellie knew it was dumb, they hadn't agreed to talk after she left, or that they would stay in contact at all, yet, a week into the semester, Ellie found herself sitting at her desk, writing out a letter to Aster. 

_ 'Dear Aster,  _

_ I know you probably don't want to hear from me, and that I can understand, I honestly don't even know if this will find you. My big plan is to send it to the university and hope it finds out.  _

_ Turns out Mrs Geselschap was right, college is like a whole other world. Though, I don't have much to compare it to, considering I haven't left Squahamish since I was five.  _

_ I thought about it, though, a few times. I thought about stopping one of the trains and just hopping on, letting it take me anywhere that wasn't that town. Never did, I wasn't brave enough, bravery has never really been my strong suit.  _

_ I hope you have settled in well, and if I don't hear back from you I understand.  _

_ Ellie Chu.' _

She thought twice about sending it, backing out three different times before Paul warned her over Facetime one night that if she didn't send it in the morning  _ he  _ would come there and do it for her. 

So she did. 

She didn't expect much to come from it, even if Paul insisted she would hear back, he just  _ knew _ it, but Ellie didn't want to get her hopes up. 

It was two weeks before she got a letter with Aster's block capital penmanship, she tore it open immediately. 

There was a letter, but behind the letter there was a small post it note that had a flower sketched into it. 

_ 'Dear ~~Paul~~ Ellie,  _

_ That's not how it works, sending the letter to the university, but you're lucky the admin lady has a soft stop for freshmans. I have put my dorm building and number on the back for future.  _

_ I don't know what has given you the impression I don't want to hear from you, receiving your letters was always the best part of my day.  _

_ I suppose that's the thing about growing up and not leaving a small town, everything seems like an adventure.  _

_ You think you're not brave? Oh, Ellie, you have absolutely no idea just how brave you are. You are brave enough to carry the world for your father. You are brave enough to be sure in who you are. You are brave enough to not change yourself to fit in. You were brave enough to kiss me.  _

_ You, Ellie Chu, are the bravest person I know.  _

_ I am settling in, my roommate is nice. And you're right, being out of Squahamish gives you time to reflect, I've been gone barely a month and I'm starting to understand myself better, being out of the grasps of Trig and my father. I feel freer, lighter, slightly more  _ _ sure.  _

_ I never did thank you, for stepping in. If not for you I may still be back there, planning a wedding.  _

_ Thank you, Ellie.  _

_ Aster Flores _

_ X' _

Ellie pinned the drawing to her wall before sitting down to begin her letter. 

\--

She knew it was kind of stupid, she  _ had  _ Aster's number, they could just text, but this felt like a happy medium. Giving Aster enough space to discover herself while still getting to talk to her. 

Ellie could settle for this.

Especially when every letter came with a post it note sketch, she couldn't get  _ that  _ over text message. 

She knew Aster wouldn't be home for thanksgiving, she had told her herself that she didn't plan on going home unless she absolutely had to ( _ I will go home on the 23rd of December and leave on the second on January _ ), but Ellie didn't think she would see her much when they were both home, anyway, Aster was clear she needed time. 

Paul was waiting for her when she stepped off the train, giving her that big goofy smile, and pulling her into a hug. 

Ellie let it happen, because she had missed him. 

It took him all of three days to bring up Aster. 

They were at Paul's place, Ellie a mere Guinea pigs, tasting all of his concoction. 

"So, have you spoken to Aster?" he asked, looking up as Ellie through his eyelashes as he set the next plate down. "I added some of the spices your dad suggested to this one."

"We have been sending letters back and forth for the past few months." Ellie shrugged nonchalantly, picking up the sausage. "Your mom is really letting you mess with her recipe?"

"She won't have a choice if I create the perfect sausage." he grinned. "And how is it going?" 

"It's fine, we are just talking, she said herself she needs time to figure herself out. Besides, I don't expect anything from her when she  _ does  _ figure herself out." Ellie took a bite out of the sausage, mulling over it for a second. "It's missing something."

Paul frowned thoughtfully as he took a bite, clicking his fingers. "I'll add a little ginger."

Ellie watched him as he went to work. 

"You like her, though, right?" he asked. 

"That doesn't really matter, if she doesn't feel the same that I will accept that." Ellie said. "You know yourself, she is great to be around."

"Mm, after I realised I didn't love her, she was easier to be around." Paul hummed. "We spent a lot of time together after you left, her entire family was angry with her so she was upset, and you'd left, so I didn't have anyone to waste my time with."

Paul laughed when Ellie threw the sausage at him, ducking out of the way as he mixed the meat. 

"She mentioned you, though." He commented, grinning when Ellie quickly looked up at him. "Ah,  _ that  _ got your attention."

"I don't--I'm not bothered."

"Mhm," Paul grinned that boyish grin. "It was only a couple of times, I think she was kind of unsure where everyone stood with each other. But when she did,she had this smile, it was- it looked like-" 

Ellie frowned softly as she watched the boy pause. "Like?" 

"Love," He said in the dumb, wistful voice that Ellie had always found endearing. 

"She doesn't love me, dude." Ellie shook her head. 

"Maybe not, not yet at least. But I think--I dunno, I'm not great with words and stuff, but when she figures herself out you guys could be good, ya know?" Paul frowned thoughtfully. "The way you spoke about her, even before I knew -which, I now feel uber dumb about, by the way-, it's obvious how you feel about her. You stopped her from getting engaged, for god sake."

"I didn't do that because of how I felt about her. If she was happy, if I knew she loved him I would have been happy for her, but she wasn't." Ellie said. "Trig was a jerk."

"Trig  _ was  _ a jerk." Paul agreed, giving Ellie a little smile. "I'm just saying, El, I think there's a good chance that this could work out."

"Maybe," Ellie hummed, resisting the urge to message Aster. 

\--

She woke up the morning of thanksgiving to a message from Aster. 

DiegaRivero: Happy thanksgiving, Ellie. I'm thankful that you stepped in before I stupidly agreed to marry Trig. 

Ellie grinned down at her phone, falling back against her pillow as she clutched her phone to her chest. 

SmithCorona: Hope you have a good thanksgiving. I'm thankful that I have found someone who understands me like you do. 

DiegaRivero: 🌭

Ellie laughed against her pillow, letting herself lie there for a second, feeling somewhat giddy, before pushing herself up and heading downstairs. 

What she didn't expect what to be met by Paul's big goofy grin, both him and her dad wearing matching aprons. 

"What are you doing here?" 

"I'm helping Edwin with dinner," he answered, motioning to all the food. "My family has it covered, and I know you guys aren't big on the holiday, but you  _ have  _ to have a nice dinner."

Ellie felt her chest warm at the gesture. 

"Okay, where do you need me?"

That made Paul's smile grow. "I was so hoping you'd ask that!" he bounded off to the living room. 

"He's a sweet kid." her father commented in Mandarin. "Even if he doesn't understand most of the time."

Paul reappeared then, holding another apron. "Let's get started."

Paul put their food down to them just after two (of course he managed to sneak in some sausage tacos for starters), before excusing himself. 

"Paul," Edwin called, and Paul turned back, raising his eyebrows questioningly. "谢谢."

"Uh," Paul looked a little dumbfounded, his eyes moving from Edwin, to Ellie and back again. He nodded. "Sure."

Edwin gave him a fond smile. "That is thank you in Mandarin."

"Oh," Paul brightened up, "How do you say you're welcome?" 

"别客气," Ellie offered. 

Paul nodded, bouncing on her toes and, God, did the boy try, both Ellie and Edwin appreciated that, but he completely butchered it. 

"Have a good night, Paul." Ellie smiled. 

"Bye, guys." He waved as he left.

\--

Paul said goodbye to her again, giving her the cooler she had brought back to him, full of food. 

When she got back to her room there was a letter waiting for her on her desk. 

_ 'Dear Ellie,  _

_ You most likely won't get this until after thanksgiving, but I hope you have/had a nice time. And make sure Paul is doing okay? You know what he's like.  _

_ I have been working on my end of semester project for over a month now, and I just can't figure out where to put that bold stroke. I think I ruined it last night, I'm going to start again, like you said, I know I can get it back to what it was before that bold stroke.  _

_ I want you to know that I look forward to your letters, but I hope you understand that this is about as much as I can do right now. I am feeling a lot more comfortable in who I am, but I still have a long way to go. I do need time to come to terms with the fact that who I am is going to change my life so much.  _

_ I hope you like the sketch this time, when I learned of the bird it reminded me of you. It is a Scrub Jay, a very unassuming bird, but when you learn about them, you realise there is a lot more to them than you first thought. They are smart, they plan for the future. They are very tactile and have been seen to use tools. Not to mention they are pretty.  _

_ Hope you're well, Ellie.  _

_ Aster Flores _

_ X' _

Ellie grabbing the sketch from the envelope, sketched out in pencil and messily coloured in. 

Ellie loved it. 

_ 'Dear Aster,  _

_ You're right, I didn't get this until after thanksgiving. My day was quiet, I cooked dinner with dad and Paul, then had a quiet dinner and movie night with my father. How was your day?  _

_ Paul is doing well, he has a few critics coming to taste his sausage taco and new sausage recipe, he is serious about this thing, I think he is going to make it by sheer willpower alone.  _

_ You have to be bold if you want a great painting. And I know you are going to create a fantastic painting, you are going to figure out where that stroke belongs.  _

_ I understand, Aster. I am not expecting anything from you, these letters are more than I ever expected when I send the first one. You are brave, coming to terms with who you are knowing how bad the fall out will be. I'm proud of you for that. _

_ I love it, I will put it on my wall with all the others.  _

_ I hope everything works out, Aster.  _

_ Ellie Chu' _

\--

Ellie didn't see Aster over Christmas, no one really did, Ellie found out in the letter waiting for her on her doorstep on Christmas eve that her father wasn't letting her out of the house, the only reason she got the letter to her was because she got Paul to pick it up. 

Come that first summer, Ellie was sure she was falling in love. 

She didn't get home until the last two weeks of summer, having been offered an internship at a local radio station that she couldn't pass up. Her father and Paul came to see her half way through the summer break, and Ellie was grateful for that. 

"I ran into Aster," Paul commented as he drove them to Pike peak National park, her father asleep in the back. "She was asking about you."

"Her father isn't keeping her at home anymore?" 

"He was," Paul hummed. "But then she agreed to spend time with Trig so he loosened the lead."

That made Ellie frown. 

"It's not what you think." Paul said. "I was taking out the trash and I saw her standing beside your little booth thingy, so I went over. She knew you weren't home, you told her in a letter? She said that she was only doing it to try and ease some of the tension at home, it isn't, like, a romantic thing, or whatever."

He glanced over at Ellie. 

"She asked me to make sure you knew that, before you heard it from the gossip around town."

Ellie nodded. "It's not really my business what she does."

"She didn't want to disappoint you. Said that you are one of the few people who believe in her, she didn't want you to think that was misplaced or something." Paul frowned thoughtfully. "She said a whole bunch of stuff, but I think that's the gist of it."

"Gist," Ellie hummed. "Good word."

Paul flashed her that big grin, and Ellie was  _ sure  _ that she loved this big idiot. 

\--

When she did get home Aster had already headed back to college, but sitting on her bed was a print of a painting, one she recognised immediately, a painting of the graffiti they had both contributed to on that wall, writing and everything. 

Ellie smiled at the print, flipping it over to see a small note scribbled on the back. 

_ 'Dear Ellie, _

_ I decided to restart my project, this is how it came out. I loved making this with you, I hope it's okay I used it.  _

_ Aster Flores  _

_ X'  _

Ellie had Paul make her a frame the following day, hanging it in her booth.

\--

Her seconds year got exponentially harder, but she always found time to write to Aster, and Aster always found time to write back, as well as sketch Ellie the small drawings that were slowly but surely taking over her wall. 

Ellie wasn't surprised when Aster didn't come home for thanksgiving, but she  _ was  _ surprised when she didn't come home for Christmas. 

SmithCorona: Merry Christmas 🎄 is everything okay? 

DiegaRivero: you used an emoji! Merry Christmas 🤶 everything is okay, I just don't think it is a good idea for me to be home right now

SmithCorona: If you ever need to talk you know where I am. 

DiegaRivero: Thank you, Ellie. 

Ellie typed, and deleted the emoji three separate times before sending it. 

SmithCorona: 🌭 

DiegaRivero: 🌭 

\--

Of course, Ellie found out what had happened before heading back to college on the tenth of January. 

Apparently, Aster had told her family that, while she liked boys, she had feelings for girls, too. Her father had given her the option of dropping out and coming home, convinced college had corrupted his little girl, or never coming home again. 

Ellie wasn't sure if she should message Aster at all, but she was on the night train, head against the window as she stared down at her conversation with Aster, trying to figure out what to say **,** only to panic when three dots appeared. 

But they disappeared and never reappeared again, so Ellie decided she wouldn't bring it up until Aster did.

\--

The letters got increasingly more intimate, and somewhat flirtatious, and Ellie couldn't quite pinpoint when everything shifted, she only realised when she was rereading one to Paul one night and Paul gave her that puppy dog frown and claimed it sounded flirtatious. 

She realised then the tone of the letters has shifted months ago. 

She got offered another internship, this time at a record label who has heard one of her songs (Ellie was sure Paul has something to do with it), so she wasn't getting home for summer, again. 

Paul called her the second week in, telling her that he was coming the following day. He has seemed entirely too giddy, but Ellie didn't question on, telling him that she wouldn't have a lot of time to hang out, with her internship. 

He had said he would meet her outside the label building after she was finished and would drive her home.  So, when she came outside, she expected to see Paul's beat up truck, but she hadn't expected to see, however, was Aster leaning against the side, hands tucked into the pockets of her jean jacket, smiling softly at her. 

She stopped mid-step, her mouth open in shock as she looked from Aster to Paul, who was handing out the window of his truck, giving her a huge grin and thumbs up over the roof of the vehicle. 

"Not long until you will be working at one of these big shot record labels, huh?" Aster said, making her way toward Ellie, smile soft, eyebrow raised. 

"It's just an internship." Ellie met her halfway. "Hey."

"Hey," Aster smiled. "It's really good to see you."

"Yeah," Ellie breathed. "I didn't-- I'm renting a place for the summer, since they kick us out of the dorms, do you guys want to come over? Paul and I can sleep on the floor, you guys can stay there."

Aster's smile slackened slightly. "You're cute when you ramble."

"I don't--I'm not-" Ellie huffed at Aster's smug smile. "Is that a yes?"

"Sure," Aster agreed. 

Paul greeted her with a big hug, scooping her up into his arms and spinning her around. 

Ellie found herself watching Aster as they drove. She looked older, somehow, her features most sculpted. She was even more beautiful than Ellie remembered, and she really didn't think that possible. 

"I'm gonna go get food for dinner," Paul said as she and Aster got out at her temporary apartment. "See you soon."

He gave her a not so subtle wink before driving off. 

"I'm glad he hasn't changed." Aster commented and Ellie hummed in agreement. 

Ellie lead her inside, thanking her lucky stars that she decided to clean the previous night. 

Ellie was nervous, cursing herself because she couldn't stop fiddling with things in the kitchen. 

"Ellie," 

"Hm?" Ellie hummed as she turned to face Aster, a little squeak of surprise leaving her throat when Aster was suddenly kissing her, a hand on her cheek, the other curling around the back of her neck. 

Ellie quickly caught up, her hands landing on her hips as she kissed back. 

"That's one all." her commented against Ellie's lips, and Ellie found herself laughing softly. "I came out to my family, they don't want anything to do with me."

"Im sorry, Aster." Ellie frowned. 

Aster shook her head, looking away from Ellie briefly. "It sucks, but I don't want to pretend."

Ellie's lips lifted in a half smile. 

"And I'm  _ sure  _ of who I am, I always was, I was just afraid to admit it." Aster took a breath, smiling sweetly at her. "I'm also  _ sure  _ about how I feel about you."

Ellie blinked in surprise. 

"I know it's been years, I understand if you don't feel the same-" 

"I do," Ellie interrupted. "I really do."

"Thank god," Aster sighed. "I was so worried I had waiting too long."

"I told you I would see you in a couple of years."

"Doesn't mean you didn't meet someone else." Aster shrugged, looking almost bashful. 

"Does this--I mean, does this mean you want to-" 

"Try this? You and me?" Aster flashed her that half grin. "If you will have me, Ellie Chu?"

Ellie couldn't help herself then, pulling Aster closer and kissing her. This time both girls were ready, Ellie wrapping her arm securely around Aster's waist while Aster pulled her in closer, deepening the kiss. 

"I will take that as a yes?" Aster breathed against her lips, a soft tumbling from her throat. 

"So many times yes."

When Paul got back half an hour later she and Aster were still in the kitchen, Aster pinned between the counter and Ellie as they kissed. 

"Kids, I'm home." he said, a grin bigger than any she had ever seen from him splitting across his face at the sight of them. 

Ellie was infinitely grateful for Paul Munsky.    
  
  



End file.
